Long Trip Alone
by AbydosGoddess
Summary: Bobby calls the boys in on a personal mission for him and them... to find his missing daughter... When they get their though it seems someone has already found her... rated M: for sexual situations... also, CHARACTER DEATH!
1. Over Sand and Stones

"Hey Bobby, what do ya need," Dean asked picking up the phone. He was sitting at the bar of the Roadhouse. Things had calmed down slightly since Sam's brush with darkness. Jo had returned home though things were still greatly strained between her and Sam. Dean watched his brother react to the way Jo would look at him with guilt. He turned his attention to Bobby Singer, on the phone with him.

"Hey, Dean. Listen umm... you remember my daughter Emma don't you? You met her when you and your daddy were here last."

"You mean when you threatened to shoot him?"

"Ha, yeah. You remember Emma don't you?"

"Vaguely," Dean said bitterly, remembering his last encounter with the young woman. "If I remember right she stole my car, took it for a joyride, and nearly crashed it. Yeah, I think I remember her."

"She didn't crash the car Dean, and she didn't nearly crash it." Bobby paused taking a deep breath and sighing loudly. "She nearly drove it off a bridge, there's a difference."

"What's the point Bobby," Dean asked quickly, trying to move on with the conversation.

"Right, she was working a job in Wyoming, calling me every other day so I knew she didn't die or something. Anyways, she hasn't called since Sam got possessed. I'm worried about her and I was wondering if you could go and find her, help her out if she needs it. I'd go but I'm knee deep in work as it is."

"You want us to go to Wyoming so we can babysit you're daughter?"

"Not babysit Dean, help. Look, she's my family, and I know her. She would have called or returned home if she was done. Something's wrong, now can you and Sam please go check it out?"

By the way Bobby was talking Dean knew it was serious. He sighed and finally gave in. "Fine, you know her last coordinates?" Bobby gave Dean Emma's last known location and Dean hung up the phone. "Sammy," he called to his brother who was talking to Ash. Both Ash and Sam walked over. "That was Bobby. He's got a job for us. Ash you can help out too. I need you to check and see if this number was used to call anyone in the last few days."

"Sure thing," Ash told Dean before taking the piece of paper with Emma's number on it and walking into his room.

Dean looked over at Sam and grabbed a map from behind the bar. He opened it up and found the coordinates on it. "All right, we're looking for a girl, Emma, she's a hunter. Bobby said she was working a job up here the past few weeks. She'd call every other day to check in but she hasn't called in the last three or four days, it's not like her not to check in."

"Check in," Sam asked with a skeptical look on his young face.

Dean sighed and shook his head. Sam had never met Emma and a daughter was never mentioned by Bobby. Dean didn't want to bring it up but there was no way around it now. "Emma's Bobby's daughter," Dean said with a sigh.

Dean's words caught the attention of both Ellen and Jo who walked over to them. "Emma Singer's missing," Ellen asked leaning over the bar. Jo had a suddenly worried expression on her face.

"We don't know. Bobby said she hasn't called about a week. Not since Sam...," Dean's voice trailed off as he looked at Jo who was still clearly traumatized by it. She didn't seem as traumatized about what Sam did as much as what he must have said. Dean still didn't know what that was. "He wants us to go check it out."

"I'm coming with you," Jo said quickly, glancing over at her mother then at Dean.

"Look, no offense Jo but I think you should stay here. It's really just a two man job, if that. We're just going to go in and find her, let Bobby know she's fine and leave. I really think you should stay here," Dean said with a sigh. Sam stayed quiet, not even looking at Jo. Jo sighed and nodded slowly. Dean was right. She knew it so what else could she do. Along with that Jo wasn't sure she wanted to be around Sam for that long, not right now at least.

Ash walked out of his room and over to Sam and Dean. "That was easy, come on guys, give me something challenging." Ash set a piece of paper down on the bar and looked at Dean. "She's called this number three times a day, everyday, for the past two weeks. Looks like she's trying to get a hold of someone who's not answering. Before the last two weeks she's called it once ever four days for the past year. Until about six months ago when she stopped when started again two weeks ago. The about three days ago all calls stopped."

Sam and Dean looked at the number and then looked at each other. "Could you excuse us for a minute?" Sam and Dean stood and walked away from the others so they could speak in private. "Sam, that's Dad's cell. She's been calling Dad for the past year. All while he was missing. Real phone calls Sam, that lasted long. It means he answered the phone. She must have been working with him."

"How much do you think she knows," Sam asked stuffing his hands in his pockets and sighing loudly.

"I don't know but at this rate she'll never get a hold of Dad. I don't think she knows he's dead." Dean sighed and the two of them walked back over to Ellen, Jo, and Ash. "That number that she's been calling was our Dad's cell phone. We umm... we think she might have been working with him when he went missing last year." The three of them nodded and Dean picked up the paper. He grabbed his jacket and both him and Sam left. They hopped in the Impala and tore off down the highway, heading towards Nowheresville Wyoming.

Sam and Dean pulled up to a small cabin in the middle of a thick Wyoming forest. The place looked as though it was falling apart at the seams. The windows were cracked, the thin wooden door hung loosely on it's hinges, threatening to fall at any moment. There were holes in the walls as well as the roof. To add to the overall creepiness of the cabin, they had arrived late that night and it was dark. The only light came from inside the cabin, the Impala's headlights and the eerie full moon that was up in the clear night sky. Dean turned off the car and looked over at Sam. Sam was staring, horrified at the cabin as if something would jump out and attack him. "Sammy?"

"I've been here," Sam whispered. Dean knew instantly what that must have meant. It coincided with how long Emma's been out of contact with her father. He slowly looked over at Dean for a moment. Then within a second Sam had thrown the car door open and rushed for the house.

Without even thinking Dean jumped out of the car, rushing to his brother's side. "Sammy," he called after his brother. Dean stopped dead in the doorway, staring at the room that Sam was looking at.

The room was torn apart. Papers were thrown on the floor, furniture was broken and overturned. Blood spattered on the walls. In the corner of the room was a young woman. Her wrists were chained to the side of the stone fireplace. She had several cuts and bruises on her and she seemed to be unconscious. Dean recognized her instantly with her short blonde hair, and pale skin. Her black t-shirt was covered in sweat and blood and sticking to her. Sam was unable to move. He stood planted in his place. Dean on the other hand ran to the girl's side. He knelt by her side, placing two fingers to her neck to check for a pulse. He breathed a loud sigh of relief and looked up at Sam. "She's alive, and breathing." Dean brushed her hair out of her face, only to have it fall back a second later. "Emma," he whispered. Dean smiled when he saw her move a little and her eyes open. "Hey," he whispered with a smile. Dean picked the locks on the chains around her wrists and she collapses into his arms. She didn't have the strength to hold herself up. Dean took a moment to look over her and realized that most of the wounds on her were superficial, made specifically to give the affect of a lot of blood loss. "Sammy, check that bag in the corner, see if there's any water. We have to get her hydrated."

Dean looked back to Emma, looking to see if she was still conscious. After a few moments when he hadn't received any water or word from Sam he looked back in his brother's direction. Sam was still standing in the same place. He hadn't moved. He was just staring at Emma. "SAM!" Dean's shouts snapped Sam out of his trance. He looked at Dean and nodded before rushing to the duffle bag in the corner of the room. He searched through the bag frantically, tearing it apart trying to find some water. Finally he found a half empty bottle of water. He threw it to Dean, missing by about a foot. Dean glared at Sam as the bottle rolled the rest of the way to Dean's feet. Dean picked it up in a hurry as Sam stood and walked to the other corner of the room. He turned the small cot that was there back over as Dean picked Emma up and carried her across the room. Dean set Emma down on the bed and Sam grabbed the bag he had just been searching through for Emma to use as a pillow. Dean lifted her head a little, pouring some water into her mouth for her to drink it. "Hey," Dean said softly.

Emma smiled faintly at him then looked up at Sam. "D… De… Dean," she whispered in a strained voice. There was worry in her voice. "D… Dean he… he's…"

"No he's not," Dean said simply, knowing what she was going to say. "Emma, Sam was possessed when he did this, and he's not possessed anymore." Dean looked up at Sam then looked down at Emma. "Sammy, go check and see what we have to eat in the car." He sighed and shook his head. Dean looked down at Emma who had fallen asleep again. He stood slowly and walked out of the cabin. He dialed Bobby's number but stood there watching Sam's slow movements. He found some chips in the car and took them into the cabin to give to Emma. Dean watched Sam through the broken window as Sam sat Emma up in his arms and helped her drink the water. He hadn't hit send yet and wasn't sure he wanted to.


	2. Walk With Me A While

"Hey, Bobby," Dean said softly after finally deciding to call Bobby. He looked back through the window at Sam as Emma lay asleep curled up with her head leaning against Sam's. He looked down at her and ran his fingers through her hair. Dean knew Sam had to feel incredibly guilty about what he had done while he was possessed. It appeared that Sam had left the girl to starve to death.

"Did you find her Dean," Bobby asked quickly. The worry and fear for his daughter's life was obvious over the phone. "Is she all right?"

"She was hurt," Dean said simply. "But umm… with some food and a little rest she'll be fine." Dean looked back at Sam and Emma. Sam had laid down next to the girl, who seemed to instantly understand that this man wasn't the same one that hurt her. He looked over at Sam and realized that his younger brother had fallen asleep. He stared at them for a moment, forgetting he was on the phone with Bobby. Sam actually looked peaceful.

"Dean," Bobby called from the other side of the phone. "Dean are you there?"

"Huh?"

"Dean, what did this too her? Did you catch it?" Bobby wanted to know what hurt his little girl, even though Emma was no little girl anymore.

"We umm… we don't know what did it yet Bobby," Dean said quietly, lying through his teeth, but it was for Sam's sake. "Once Emma's more alert we'll talk to her about it. I'll call you as soon as we know more Bobby." Dean sighed and hung up the phone. He stood outside for a long time, watching his brother. Finally Dean walked back into the cabin and Sam woke up. He sat up slowly and looked at Dean. "We should probably get her out of here. To a hotel or something with a real bed, so she can get some rest and get cleaned up. We can get her something to eat there too."

Sam nodded silently and stood slowly, picking Emma up. It shook her from her sleep and she opened her eyes. The only reason she didn't scream or fight is because she saw Dean there. Sam carried her to the car and set her in the back seat. Then he and Dean climbed into the front. Dean was at the wheel, Sam in the passenger seat. Dean glanced through the mirror at Emma who sat silently. "I'm going out on a limb," Emma began in a quiet, strained voice. "But I'm guessing this is the infamous prodigal son, Sam," she said with a laugh. When Sam had attacked her he never said who he was, so she didn't know until she saw him with Dean.

Dean laughed and glanced over at his brother who seemed thoroughly shocked by the way Emma was reacting to him. He expected her to hate him, to want to kill him but instead she was making fun of him. "How'd you know," Dean asked with a laugh.

"Well when he was chaining me to the fireplace and playing with the knives, torturing me, I just couldn't help but think… 'This has got to be a Winchester.' He just had that Winchester air about him. I must say though, that whole thing you did Sammy," she said looking at the younger Winchester. "It was incredibly hot. But I'm going to guess that it wasn't really you. Possession maybe?"

"It's Sam," Sam corrected her without even thinking. He didn't want to think about what the demon had made him do to her. He didn't want to think about any of it. He nodded slowly when she asked about him being possessed.

"I could kind of tell," she said with a smile. "You look harmless. No offense or anything, but you don't exactly scream murderous raving lunatic. Though history shows that most murderous raving lunatics don't look it… so I could be wrong."

Sam actually laughed at her comments and glanced over at his brother. This girl was certainly a lot like her father, and frighteningly like Sam's own brother. "I'm sorry," Sam said quietly.

"The only thing you should be sorry for is the fact that the demon didn't make you have sex with me. Cause that would have been the hottest thing ever. So the demon just had you tease me and torture me and then you left." She hugged her knees to her chest and smiled at him. "No follow through. That was the worst part. Now I need to find a way to work off this pent up sexual aggression and no one to take it out on."

"Hi," Dean piped up when she finished speaking. "You can take it out on me Em."

"Dean, I'm weak, but I'm not that weak. I need food, but I'm not quite delusional yet. If I'm going to have sex with a Winchester it would be John, or Sam now that I know what he looks like."

"AHHH," Dean screamed when she mentioned John's name. "God, Emma I can't know that!"

"What? I can't help it if you're dad was hot... you know for an older guy," Emma said with a laugh. It also got a laugh out of Sam. "You just missed out on the good looks in the family apparently Dean. It's all right, I'm sure there's some blind, deaf girl that would love to have sex with you... or a blind gay man, that would probably be more your style." She smiled and leaned forward as best she could, managing to plant a small kiss on Dean's cheek. "You know you missed me." Emma smiled and sat back in the back seat. She closed her eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep.

Emma stayed asleep for most of the ride back to town. She woke up, curled up on a bed in a hotel room. Emma opened her eyes slowly. The room was dark. Thanks to the light outside from the streetlights, Emma was able to make out her surroundings. She was in a room with two beds. She saw Sam sleeping on the other bed, but didn't see Dean. Emma wondered where he was for a moment as she rolled over. When she did she saw Dean sleeping on the bed next to her. She smiled to herself, thinking about their last meeting. Last time Dean and Emma were together they found it almost impossible to keep their hands off each other. Luckily for the both of them neither of their fathers had any knowledge of that.

Emma smiled moving a little closer to him. She stopped and moved back when she saw him smile, telling her he was awake. "Aww, you're such a tease, Emma," he whispered.

"Shut up and go back to sleep Winchester," she said with a small laugh. The rest of the night was silent as the three of them slept. Over the next few days at her home Emma regained her strength as well as her razor sharp wit. It was decided that once Emma was a hundred percent again she would go hunting with the boys, instead of alone. None of them ever told Bobby what had actually happened to Emma in the woods in Wyoming. They all suspected he knew though. He didn't treat Sam any different, though the thought he would. Emma was obviously hiding her feelings about what happened. Neither Sam, nor Dean brought it up though. Dean could see it in her eyes. He knew that look because he still held it at times. He understood though. She knew that the man that hurt her wasn't really Sam, just a demon in Sam's body. It was still hard. She didn't let it show though.

Emma's been on the road for two weeks with the boys now. Her and Dean have been at each other's throats by day and in each other's arms by night. As soon as Sam fell asleep Dean and Emma's clothes came off. While they never woke Sam up, Sam did know what was going on only a few feet from him. Morning after morning he woke up to find their clothes thrown around the room. It was obvious what they had been doing. Sam wasn't going to complain though. So far he hadn't witnessed it so he wasn't even going to make mention that he know. Sam simply pretended that it wasn't happening.

The last few days, Emma and Dean hadn't gone near each other though. They were too annoyed with one another and Sam to even bother with sex. The trio was working a case that none of them could make heads or tails of. Finally they called in Bobby.

Bobby walked into the room and Emma nearly tackled him. "It's nice to see you too sweetheart," he said giving his daughter a hug. "Now, what is it you three wanted to talk about?"

Sam and Dean sat down on their corresponding beds with a sigh. Emma sat on the floor between them. "It's this job we've been working on. We weren't sure you'd believe us," Sam said quietly.

"I can believe a lot," Bobby answered.

"Trust be Dad, you wouldn't have believed this if we told you over the phone."

Sam began the story, not more than five minutes later Dean interrupted, saying Sam was telling it wrong. Emma rolled her eyes and listened to Dean retell the story. Sam interrupted this time and Emma sighed loudly. "STOP IT," she snapped at them. "Actually, Dad, it was somewhere in the middle. She was more of a drunken 'classy chick' and that has nothing to do with what happened so could you boys please continue." Sam sighed and went on with the story, exaggerating yet again about the amount of food that Dean had put in his mouth. Emma simply nudged his leg with her elbow and glared. Shortly after that though it was Emma that interrupted. "At this point I told Sam that it couldn't possibly have been Dean touching his computer. It wasn't gay porn." Sam laughed and Dean glared at her, growling quietly. "Can we please just fastforward to the good part? Se, Sam and Dean were fighting over Sam's money and Sam tackled Dean onto the bed. Then they tore off each other's clothes and-"

"That didn't happen," Sam and Dean shouted in unison.

"Reality has it's basis in perception and I perceived you two having hot wild sex."

"Bobby," Sam said looking to Emma's father. "Do you have any idea how dirty your daughter is?"

"What are you talking about," Bobby asked, smiling at his daughter. "Emma's a sweet innocent little-"

"Demon child," Dean interrupted quickly. "No wait, she's the daughter of the Devil himself."

"That's not what you said about me the other night when you were taking off my clothes and kissing ever inch of skin you exposed." Emma smiled when she saw Dean's look of fear and her father's look of rage.

"I've never even thought of touching your daughter Bobby," Dean said quickly. Dean turned bright red and seemed to cower away from Bobby.

"All of you," Bobby snapped. "Stop right now. If the three of you would take a moment to take your heads out of your asses you'd see what's getting at you."

The whole job was an embarrassment for Sam, Dean and Emma. They had been so distracted by each other, they didn't see what was right in front of them. It had been a week since Bobby went home and the Winchesters, plus Emma had left in search of a new job. Emma lay in her bed, staring up at the ceiling unable to sleep. Sam was laying fast asleep in his bed and Dean was sleeping next to Emma. Emma sighed and played with the hem of the tank top she was wearing. She closed her eyes, trying to drift back to sleep when she felt soft fingers graze her stomach. Emma opened her eyes and looked over at Dean and smiled. He leaned forward and lightly kissed her lips, pulling her closer to him. They didn't do anything that night though. Emma simply fell asleep with Dean's arms wrapped around her.


	3. Hide Beneath Your Smile

It was silent, dead silent, the kind of silence that could only be brought on by pain. "Just wait here," Sam's voice broke through the silence. His voice was broken. It tore at Emma in a painful way that he never could have when he was possessed.

"Sam," She began. All he had to do was look at her. The tears flooding down his face, the pain in his eyes was enough to silence her. Emma nodded slowly and watched Sam walk away. After a brief moment she felt a shaky hand take hers, holding it for dear life. Emma turned to Dean and saw a single tear slide down his face. She sighed softly and rested her head against his chest, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. She didn't even hear the gunshot, not really. It didn't register. She felt Dean flinch and knew it was done. It was over.

The drive out of San Francisco was silent. Emma sat in the back seat, staring out the window. The only sound for hours was Sam's soft sobbing. Every so often Dean glanced over at him. She was just beginning to learn how truly complex the Winchesters really were and she wondered if she could handle it. She wanted so badly to make everything all right for them. Even though he didn't show it Emma knew Dean was hurting too.

Dean pulled into a hotel room hours away from the pain they had left. After getting settled in the room Dean said he was going to get some food. Emma was in the shower and Sam was laying on one of the beds. His clothes were still stained with Madison's blood. When Emma walked out of the bathroom, clad in a black tank top and blue cotton pajama pants with clouds on them, Sam was still staring at the ceiling.

Emma sighed softly and walked over to him. The steps seemed an eternity as she tried to think of something to say. Emma sat next to him on the bed. She took his hand and went to speak but silenced herself. Sam tore his stare from the ceiling to look at Emma. After a moment of gazing, Sam sat up and changed his position on the bed. He was now lying on his side, across the bed. His back was to Emma and his head rested in her lap as a child's might. Emma sighed softly, running her thin fingers through his hair. "Sammy," she whispered. "I'm so sorry Sam." It sounded so stupid but it was all she could think of to say at the time and the silence was killing her.

When Dean finally came back after stopping for a drink or two and getting gas in the car along with the food, he found Emma curled up on the bed asleep next to Sam. Part of Dean just wanted to leave them be. He sighed softly and set the food down, knowing that he couldn't do that. Dean knew it was far too soon for Sam to wake up with a girl in bed with him, regardless of who it was. He walked over and picked Emma up, setting her gently on the other bed. Then Dean pulled his shirt over his head and climbed into bed next to her. Shortly after he lay down he felt soft fingertips graze his chest, sending chills down his spine. He looked down and saw Emma curl up next to him. In bed, Dean and Emma had never been soft and compassionate, loving, like this. He couldn't help but hold her close though.

He ran his fingers through her short hair before his hand slid down her back. Emma looked up at him. Their eyes locked for a moment before she closed her eyes as Dean's lips touched hers softly. She had never received a soft, almost timid kiss from Dean. His kisses were always forceful, rough, full of lust and passion. This was filled with a different kind of passion. It was something soft. Emma broke the kiss and looked over at Sam. She looked back at Dean and saw this needy look in his eyes. Emma stared at him for a moment as Dean laced his fingers with Emma's and kissed her softly once more. His hands were shaking as he held her hand.

Emma climbed out of bed and led Dean out of the room silently. She would give Dean his much needed escape. She didn't want to do that now because of what happened but Dean needed this and she could see it. She wasn't going to do anything with Sam in the same room though. Emma led him into the hall and picked the lock to the room next door. It was empty, as were most of the rooms in the small town's hotel. Emma led Dean inside before closing the door and locking it. She turned around and looked at Dean. "I can't, not with Sammy there, not after-"

"I know," Dean whispered silencing her. He stood only inches from her and ran his fingers through her hair. The look in his eyes was something frightening. Emma had never seen it before. It wasn't dark but it scared her all the same. She didn't know what it was but she found herself lost in his piercing, pain filled eyes. She didn't even notice him slowly backing her against the wall. Normally by now their clothes would be gone and they'd be going at each other like sex deprived rabbits. That was not the case this time around though. There was something different about it.

Emma looked up at him when she felt her back hit the wall. Dean's hands rested on her hips, slipping under her tank top. Somehow Dean's callused hands always seemed to send chills up and down her spine. Emma's hands slid up Dean's bare chest. They stopped over his heart. She wondered silently what Sam must be going through; knowing he was the reason Madison's heart no longer beat like Dean's did. It killed her to think the kind of guilt that Sam must be feeling right now.

Her thoughts returned to the room when she felt Dean's lips press firmly to hers. There was a familiar sense of urgency in Dean's kiss. The desire that fueled it was something not so familiar to Emma. Dean held her and kissed her with a desire brought on by the desperate need for an escape. Usually lust fueled their touch, but tonight everything was different. Nothing would be the same between them.

Emma returned his hungry, almost desperate kiss with a forceful one of her own. Her tongue parted his lips and slid into his mouth, moving against his as they fought for who would control the kiss. Dean easily won that battle. Her hands moved up around his neck and laced in his short hair. Dean's lips left Emma's and traveled down her neck. Emma took in a sharp breath, pulling Dean closer to her. He pulled her shirt over her head and threw it behind him. Emma moaned softly as Dean bit gently at her lower lip. He picked her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist and Dean slammed her against the wall. Dean pressed his hips against hers, eliciting a slightly louder moan from Emma.

He carried her to the bed and set her down. Dean climbed on top of her and kissed her lips passionately. Dean's lips traveled down Emma's neck and over her collarbone. This time the moan came from him as his lips moved over her chest. He encompassed her left breast with his mouth. His tongue flicked against her nipple as he sucked gently on her skin. Emma arched her back as Dean's lips traveled to her right breast and did the same. His touch and movements were just as aggressive as ever but there was something different. Perhaps it was the silence. On a number of occasions there were more words involved. Now it was silent though.

Emma took in another deep breath as Dean's lips traveled lower, over her ribs and stomach. He tugged down her pajama pants and the small pair of panties that she wore under them, throwing them into the increasing pile of clothing on the floor. Emma was laying completely exposed to him now. "Dean," she whispered breathlessly as his lips traveled up the inside of her left thigh. Dean's lips traveled upward slowly, spreading her legs farther. He could feel her quiver as she always did when he'd flick his tongue against her moistening core. She let out a louder moan as Dean's tongue worked it's infamous Dean magic that always made her shiver. Dean climbed back on top of her, sliding his hand down between her legs. Emma's back arched beneath his touch. They managed to remove Dean's pants but Emma was so caught up in his touch that she didn't notice. This was supposed to be for Dean but she seemed to be getting more out of it than he was. Emma knew better though. She knew with every reaction she gave, Dean fell farther into his escape, his delusion that the world was perfect.

When Dean finally spread her legs and thrust inside her she realized that he had taken his clothes off. Dean kissed her softly, ever so softly as he moved effortlessly inside her. Emma's heart beat faster with every thrust. She had gotten so used to holding back her moans. She was glad she didn't have to this time. Every time Dean pulled out a little he thrust back into her harder, making her moan involuntarily. He was becoming more aggressive as well. Dean pinned her hands above her head and began pounding into her. The bed knocked loudly against the wall as he drove into her but either they didn't notice or didn't care. Emma let out a loud moan that bordered on an ecstatic scream as Dean thrust down once more.

They rolled over to Dean was on his back and Emma was on top of him. Dean put his hands on her hips, guiding her body up and down. Dean smiled up at her faintly as she groaned. It was beyond pleasure, it was ecstasy. Emma's heart pounded beneath her breast and she couldn't fight the moans that escaped her mouth. They continued just like that for hours until the two were completely exhausted. Neither was able to last as long as usual because of the stress of the day's events. That was all right though. They both got what they wanted and more from each other.

Now she was curled up in his arms her head resting against his chest. The night was still and there was something on the air that Emma had never felt before. She closed her eyes and listened to Dean's heart and the sound of his breathing. Both of them were breathing heavily, panting really and their bodies were covered in sweat. The blankets covered their bodies as Emma lay with her legs entwined with Dean's. "I love you," Dean whispered.

Emma simply laughed, thinking it really meant, 'thank you'. "Sure."

"Really Em, I mean it," he whispered distantly.

Emma sat up quickly and looked at Dean. Her heart stopped. "What?" It was too late though. Dean had fallen asleep. Emma stared at him, watching him sleep and smiled. He looked so peaceful. Emma decided that if Dean didn't bring it up in the morning she would just pretend it didn't happen. She leaned down and pressed her lips to Dean's softly. "I love you too," she whispered in his ear. Everything in all three of their lives changed that night.


	4. A Little Peace of Mind

Six weeks had passed since Madison died, six weeks since Dean said the most terrifying three words in the English language. They had worked on a few other cases since then. Sam was slowly getting over Madison's death. Their spirits were high. Dean and Emma were at each other's throats even more than usual though. Emma seemed to be tired a lot. She was sleeping more and seemed to be sick more often. Sam and Dean thought nothing of it though, attributing it to the stress. It was early in the morning when Emma walked out of the bathroom after taking an unusually long shower. She wore her blue jeans and a black tank top. "Hey Sammy, can you go somewhere that's… not here? I need to talk to your brother."

Sam laughed and looked over at Dean who was sitting at the table. Dean looked at Emma and smiled. "Ooo someone got in trouble," Sam said with a laugh. "I'll just go get breakfast." Sam grabbed his coat and walked out of the room, smiling all the way.

Emma sat down at the table across from Dean. He knew by her voice that she was angry. Dean simply slapped on his charming smile. "Wow, Em your boobs look great today. Are they bigger?"

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about Dean." She paused and looked down for a moment before glancing up at Dean. "I'm late."

"For what? Are you getting your boobs done," Dean asked excitedly. "I mean, cause I think they're fine just the way they are but if you really want to-"

"NO DEAN," she shouted. "That's not what I mean. I'm late," she repeated.

"I heard you. Where are you supposed to be?"

Emma rolled her eyes and Dean though for sure he heard her growl. "Nowhere Dean. That's not what I mean when I say I'm late."

Dean sat there in silence just as agitated as Emma was. Then suddenly his eyes widened as he realized what she meant. "AHH! Why are you telling me that Emma? I don't want to know that."

"Dean count on your left hand the number of men I've had sex with in the last six weeks!"

Dean raised his hand to count and realized the answer almost instantly. "No. Are… are you sure?"

"No. I wanted to tell you before I took the test. You know, so I could sort of ease you into it… just in case."

"Oh," Dean said taking a deep breath. Emma stood and walked into the bathroom as Sam walked back into the room. He had just run down to the hotel lobby to get some breakfast.

"So what'd I miss?"

"Emma's p… p… p… possessed."

"So naturally we lock her in the bathroom," Sam asked looking down at his brother with a puzzled expression.

"Not… demonically. She may be-"

"Is," Emma shouted from the bathroom.

"What!? Are you sure?"

"Yes Dean it's pretty clear!" Emma walked out of the bathroom and looked at Sam and Dean.

"Oh my God," Sam whispered and almost dropped the food in his hands. "You're… you're…"

"You're pregnant," Dean asked standing slowly. Emma nodded slowly. Her skin was ghostly pale and her hands were trembling involuntarily. "Oh God."

"I have a question," Sam began, "When did all this happen?"

"If I tell you will you kill me," Dean asked shyly. Sam simply glared at his brother.

"Six weeks," Emma said quietly. "The night we left San Francisco." Sam had a saddened expression on his face when Emma mentioned San Francisco. It seemed funny to him though that a life was created the very night he ended one.

Dean remained still for a moment and glanced over at Emma. A rush of mixed feelings filled him. He was going to be a father. Part of him wanted to take Emma in his arms and celebrate. Part of him wanted to run but most of him just wished that his own father was with him. He looked at Emma and saw tears in her eyes. Dean had never once seen Emma cry before. He walked over to her slowly and wrapped her in his arms. "Shh," he whispered. "We'll figure it out."

"Figure it out," Emma snapped, looking up at Dean. "Dean I'm having a baby, your baby! This is no life for a child, you know that as well as I do." She shook her head and took a step back, running her fingers through her short blonde hair. "Maybe… maybe we should just… just give it up. Someone else could give-"

"NO! That's not an option Emma. My dad made it work, so did yours. We can too."

"Dean we don't just have to worry about demons or spirits. You were able to stay relatively safe in the hotels while your dad hunted. We can't do that. You have the law after you as well, or did you forget that?"

"I didn't forget Emma. I know what we have against us, I'm aware of that." He sighed and looked down at her. "Emma we have to try though. You know me. I'm not one to give anything up. Besides," he began with a smirk, "that things half Winchester and half Singer. No one will be able to handle it." Emma looked up at Dean and allowed a faint smile to form on her face. There was a long silence as Dean held Emma and Sam watched on in shock.

"Oh God," Emma said quickly leaning away from Dean's embrace. She sank down on the end of the bed and stared at the floor. "What am I going to tell my dad?"

"Do we have to," Dean asked quickly. He hadn't even thought of telling Bobby or what Bobby would do until Emma mentioned it. Dean's response got a loud, poorly stifled laugh from Sam.

"Do we have to?" Emma rolled her eyes and glanced over at Sam who simply shrugged. "Dean it's kind of hard to hide a baby. I have to go home sometime."

"Why? I say you never go home."

"All right, so nine months from now we're on a hunt and I go into labor, then what?" She rolled her eyes and sighed before glaring up at him. "Besides, I can't go hunting with you when I'm nine months pregnant anyway. Where the hell am I gonna stay? You don't expect me to wait till then to tell my dad do you?"

"The Roadhouse," Dean answered flashing his sheepish grin at her.

"Because my father and Ellen are never in communication with each other," Emma said sarcastically. "Just face it Dean. We have to tell him. We're done here so we might as well head to my place and get it over with. The sooner we get it done the better. Trust me, he'd really kill you if I showed up at home in nine months."

Dean sighed and sank down onto the bed next to Emma. "He's gonna kick my ass." He looked up at Emma for a brief moment. "I guess we should head out." Dean glanced over at Sam and let his little brother see the fear in his eyes for just a split second.

They had been driving for hours. Sam glanced in the back seat and saw that Emma had drifted off to sleep. "How are you takin' all this," Sam asked, looking over at his older brother.

Dean's gaze was firmly set to the road ahead. It hadn't wavered in hours. The biggest sign that something was wrong though was the fact that the car was silent. There was absolutely no music playing. "What do you mean?"

"Oh come on Dean. You can't fool me, you can't fool Emma. How are you handling this?"

Dean sighed and finally turned his gaze from the road ahead. "I'm scared, Sam. I'm gonna be a father," Dean sighed. "I… I…" He couldn't think of anything that sounded right. Dean had no idea how to convey what he was feeling. Finally some words came to him. "Hell, I have enough trouble takin' care of you. How am I going to raise a child?" He let out a loud frustrated sigh and banged his fists against the steering wheel. "I just… I wish Dad was here, you know."

Sam simply nodded and looked out the window. Both were silent for a long time. Each took time to wrap their minds around what was happening. Dean had a whole different kind of responsibility thrust on his shoulders. Sam was unsure how his big brother would handle it. After all, Dean was no longer just a big brother. After a little more than an hour of silence, Sam could take it no longer. He glanced over at Dean and watched him intently for a moment. "You know Dad would kick your ass right?"

Dean smirked and glanced into the mirror, watching Emma sleep silently. "Probably," Dean laughed. "He'd get over it though. You know why?"

"Cause you'd run away crying?"

"No Sam! I don't cry." Dean paused and glanced at Emma one more time with a smile on his face. "Cause he'd be a grandpa."

Sam laughed and rolled his eyes. "First he'd kick your ass."

"Shut up Sam," Dean said, shoving his baby brother before turning on the radio.

Several hours later they pulled up to Ellen Harvelle's roadhouse. It was the only pit stop before Dean reached the wrath of Hell that awaited him. The three of them walked inside. Dean and Emma sat down at the bar. Ellen handed them each a beer. Emma smiled and brought the bottle to her lips to take a drink. Dean quickly grabbed the bottle and put it back on the bar. Ellen raised and eyebrow as Dean smiled, frantically trying to think up some rational excuse. "She's getting over a nasty hangover." Ellen nodded but still seemed suspicious.

Sam and Ash sat at a nearby table. They were talking about tracking the Demon, or at least Sam was trying to. Ash was staring at Emma and Dean. "Ash are you even listening?"

"Sure Sam," he answered vacantly. "Hey Sam, do Emma's boobs look bigger to you?"

Sam glanced over at Emma then turned his gaze back to Ash. "Not that I take notice, but yes."

"Oh you know you steal a glance every now and then," Ash said with a smile.

"Not to Dean's knowledge. They look bigger because they are Ash."

"She got a boob job?"

"No Ash. Emma's pregnant."

"Who's is it," he asked excitedly.

"Dean's." Clearly Sam did not get the memo that said it was a secret until Bobby found out. Not only that but he just told the worst person possible.

"Dean knocked up Emma," Ash shouted staring wide-eyed at Sam.

There were two loud crashes. One came from Jo in the corner. She dropped the tray she was holding. The other came from Ellen. She had her back to Dean and Emma, cleaning glasses and she dropped one as soon as Ash spoke. Ellen turned slowly and glared at the two of them. Dean and Emma stared in terror, both were ghostly pale. "Woops," Sam whispered quickly looking away as if that would save him.


	5. Everybody Stubles Sometimes

-1"You did what, Dean Winchester," Ellen asked looking down at Dean. Dean stared at her with what could only be described as the purest form of terror in his eyes. "Tell me this is some kind of joke."

Dean and Emma just glanced at each other then looked back at Ellen. "Ellen," Emma began, "I can explain. It was an accident."

"An accident," Jo blurted out, walking up to the two of them. She looked at Dean with the smallest hint of hurt and betrayal in her eyes, as if he did something to her. "What did you trip and fall on his dick?"

"Actually," Emma said with a faint smile. She glanced at Dean and saw him smirking at the memory.

"Well not that time," he said with a laugh.

"This is no laughing matter Dean Winchester," Ellen told him sternly, glaring back at Ash who seemed to find the whole situation hysterical.

"I'm aware of that Ellen," the eldest Winchester snapped. He took a swig of his beer and sighed looking down at Emma who was staring at the floor. Everyone was glaring at her. Dean felt awful. He couldn't even begin to imagine what she was going through. "It's Sam's fault anyway," he said trying to lighten the mood.

"What?! How the hell is it my fault," Sam said quickly, standing to his feet. "I didn't have anything to do with what you two did to create that child."

"You had everything to do with it Sam," Emma snapped. She stood and walked over to him, looking up at his 6'4" frame. "It was you that started it all."

"What did I do," Sam asked defensively.

Emma tried to show him she wasn't angry but it didn't work because Dean was obviously angry. "Sam, it was right after Madison. Dean… Dean watched as you walked away to kill someone. Take a life, the one thing he's always protected you from. He…," Emma looked down and sighed. "That's all it was, an escape and now look what's happened Dean," she said looking back at the older Winchester.

Dean walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her. Sam simply stared at them for a moment before looking down. He had never thought of how his actions affected Dean. "What am I going to tell my dad Dean," Emma whispered. She hadn't mentioned telling her father the whole ride to the Roadhouse. She was too afraid to bring it up.

"We'll figure something out Emma, don't worry," Dean whispered to her.

"You haven't told your father yet Emma," Ellen snapped.

"We're on our way there now." Emma's voice was soft, almost as if she was ashamed of what her and Dean had done. "No one else was supposed to know until I told my father."

"I'm sorry," Sam said quietly, looking away from Emma and his brother.

Shortly after that the boys and Emma got back into the Impala. The rain was pouring down outside and they were soaked to the bone almost immediately. As Dean pulled away Emma glanced out the window and looked back at the Roadhouse. Emma thought back on her days growing up and the second family she had in the Harvelles. She remembered being there the night Ellen found out about her husband's death. She could still clearly see the tears in little Jo's eyes.

Dean glanced into the rearview mirror and sighed softly when he saw her. She was scared, he knew she was though she hid it well. A child was the farthest thing from Dean's mind. He didn't know the first thing about being a father. Dean glanced over at Sam then looked back at the road.

The hours passed on like an eternity as the drove from the Harvelle's Roadhouse to Bobby Singer's in South Dakota. "It'll be all right Emma," Dean whispered as they pulled up the driveway. "He'll understand."

"You obviously don't know my daddy Dean," she whispered. The three of them slowly opened their doors and climbed out of the car. The creaking of the old car's doors echoed in the silence. It was well into the night by the time they reached Bobby's. Emma looked around for a moment then looked at Dean. She walked up to him and placed her hands on his chest, feeling his heart race beneath her fingertips. Their eyes met and Emma smiled faintly. "I'm gonna have a baby," she whispered as if it had just hit her then that she was pregnant.

The three of them slowly walked up to the front door. Emma stood in front with Dean next to her and Sam behind the two of them. She glanced up at Dean before knocking on the door. "Daddy," she called, her voice shaky and frightened.

Bobby opened the door and smiled widely when he saw his daughter standing in front of him. "Emma," he said with a smile, hugging her close. "What are you doing here. Hey, Dean, Sam." He nodded at them

Emma glanced up at Dean before speaking. "We need to tell you something Daddy." Emma took a deep breath and glanced at Dean once more before turning her gaze onto her father.

"Sure, come on in." Bobby moved to the side to let the three into the house.

Emma walked in first, followed by Dean, who stayed as far from Bobby as possible as he walked by, then finally Sam entered. Emma walked into the living room and turned to her father. "Dad, you don't have any weapons near you do you?"

Bobby cast a puzzled glance in his daughter's direction as he closed the door. "No, why?"

"Nothing that can be used as a weapon?"

"No Emma, why?"

Emma took a deep breath and glanced at Dean before looking at her father and taking a step backwards. "Dean has something he wants to tell you."

"What," Dean shouted looking back at Emma. "Why do I have to do it?"

"Because it's your fault."

"It takes two Emma!"

"EMMA'S PREGNANT," Sam shouted. It was clear that Sam couldn't take the tension anymore.

Emma glared at him and Dean's face turned pure white as he stared wide eyed in terror at Bobby who froze as soon as Sam spoke. "Honestly Sam," Emma began, "how can you call yourself a hunter if you crack so easily?"

Bobby walked up to Dean and stared him in the eyes. "I'm assuming you're responsible for this Winchester," he growled.

Dean swallowed hard and looked over at Emma for support. Emma simply backed away and hid behind Sam. "Yes sir," the shorter Winchester whispered. Dean had seen some frightening things in his life but nothing terrified him the way Bobby did at that moment.

"Daddy," Emma said walking up behind Bobby, "don't be so angry with him. I had something to do with this too."

Bobby turned to glare at his daughter, his pride and joy. "I'll get to you young lady!"

"Yes Daddy," she said backing up behind Sam again.

"Right now I want to have a private chat with Dean here."

Sam and Emma stood there for a moment, staring at Dean's terrified face. "Move Sam," Emma whispered practically pushing Sam out the door.

"Emma," Dean called after her but was cut off by Bobby pushing him back. He looked down at the older man and took a step back.

"How do you plan on fixing this Dean?"

"Fixing it? I hope you're not saying what I think you're saying. There's no way either of us are giving that up Bobby," Dean said confidently. He was going to do his father proud. He was going to be a good father. There was no way Dean was going to give that up.

"That's not what I meant Dean. I will NOT have my Emma being a single mother!"

"She won't be," Dean said quickly. "I'm not leaving her Bobby."

"So you intend to marry her then?"

Dean turned even more white at those words. Marriage? "Bobby," he began and took another step back at Bobby's face grew a deeper, angrier shade of red. "Neither Emma nor I want to get married Bobby. That doesn't mean I'm going to leave her to raise the baby by herself."

"You better take care of that girl Dean, or you will be in a world of pain."

"Yes sir."

"EMMA!"

Emma ran into the room as soon as she heard her father's voice. "Yes Daddy?"

"I need to speak with you now. You can go Dean." Dean nodded and was out of the door in the blink of an eye. Bobby turned to face his daughter and glared at her for a moment before a smile formed on his face. "To tell you the truth, I figured that kind of behavior would come from you two but I thought you would be more responsible about it Emma."

Emma looked down, ashamed of her behavior. She didn't look up until she felt strong arms around her and saw her father holding her. "I'm sorry Daddy."

"Tell me something Emma," he said taking a step back and releasing his daughter from the embrace. "Do you love him?"

"Dean?" Emma paused and looked down. She wasn't sure what to say. She knew she certainly had strong feelings for Dean, she had since the moment she met him. Still she wasn't sure it was love. She knew what her father wanted to hear though. "Yes Daddy."

He smiled at her and hugged her close. "Go tell him that then."

Emma nodded slowly and walked out the door to the junkyard where Sam and Dean were standing. She looked at Dean and swallowed hard. "Well, that actually went better than I anticipated."

"Really," Dean snapped. "Emma he asked me if I was going to marry you!"

"Yeah well he asked if I was in love with you!"

Dean stood straight and cocked his head to the side at her words. "What… what'd you say?"

She looked away and took a few deep breaths before answering him. "I said yes," she whispered so quickly there was no way anyone could understand it.

"What?"

"I said yes Dean! I don't know if it was true though," she said with a sigh. "You and me Dean, we don't… We don't "fall in love". Not like Sam." At her words the youngest lowered his head, remembering Jessica. "What the hell was I supposed to say though? My father would have been furious if I said no, or even if I said I didn't know."

"I love you," Dean said simply, as if it was the easiest thing he'd ever said. "It's not that hard Emma. I. Love. You."


	6. Short Piece of Time

-1"I. Love. You."

The words still echoed in Emma's mind even three weeks after he said them. By now her father had adjusted to the news and was even excited for them. The trio didn't stay at Bobby's very long, only a few days. Then they were off on the hunt again. Much to Emma's disagreement Dean had the brilliant idea of doing an old friend of their father's a favor. It involved them willingly putting themselves in prison. Emma tried to convince Dean of how stupid he was but it didn't work and they were gone for almost a week. It drove Emma crazy. When they finally did return to the hotel Emma was staying at in Illinois they had ditched the plates on the Impala and gotten rid of every trace of themselves. Dean explained to Emma what happened. Needless to say, Emma was furious. That wasn't important though. They were on another case.

People were going missing. Emma and Sam stayed behind at the hotel to figure out what was happening and Dean left to try and find the people, and whatever was doing this to them. It was Sam that called Dean that night to tell him. Emma wanted to but Sam insisted. It was a djinn, a kind of genie. "Sam, I have a bad feeling about this. Just tell him to come back here and we'll tell him what it is. You know what will happen if you tell him now, he'll just want to go after it a-"

"Hey, Dean." Emma rolled her eyes as Sam spoke of a cop car outside. "Yeah, well we know what it is. It's a djinn. These things are everywhere in the Quran." Sam paused for a moment. "Dean wait, let me and Em go-"

"Is he gonna?! Alone?! What is he stupid?! Give me that damn phone Sam!" It was too late though. Dean had already hung up the phone. Emma sighed and looked at Sam. "We have to find him. I mean what if this thing sneaks up on him or something Sam. He's such an idiot."

What was happening? Nothing was right. He had called Sam and Sam insisted he was drunk dialing. Why would Sammy say something like that? Who was this Carmen chick and where the hell was Emma? "Sammy, what about Emma?"

"Emma? Who's Emma? Dean… you're not… you're not cheating on Carmen are you?"

"What? What the hell are you talking about?"

"Dean, who the hell is Emma?"

Dean hung up the phone when he heard a voice behind him. "Dean?" For a brief moment he swore he heard Emma's voice but it was too soft, too gentle to be Emma.

He turned and saw the woman he woke up next to, Carmen. "Hi… Carmen." He spoke to her for a few moments, telling her that everything was all right and he'd come back to bed soon. He took a moment to look around the room at the pictures. What was happening? Why would Sammy say he's drunk? Where was Emma?

Then he saw it. One picture seemed to explain everything. He held it in his hands unable to believe it was real. It couldn't be real. Without putting it back on the shelf he dropped it and was out the door. Dean smiled when he saw his baby sitting outside his house. "Thank god," he whispered. Dean got in the car and tore off down the road. He pulled up to what he always thought was Hell on Earth, his old home in Lawrence. Dean ran out of the car and up to the door, pounding on it and ringing the doorbell incessantly. The light came on and the door opened and Dean's heart stopped. "Mom?"

Wishes can come true. They had for Dean. His mother was alive, Sam was with Jessica. Nothing could go wrong now. That's what Dean thought until he started seeing this girl. Then, while sitting at home watching television he saw the report. It was the second anniversary of the crash of United Britania flight 424. The crash that Sam and Dean had stopped. That's when it started. Everything began to crumble. Everyone his father, Sam, and he had saved was dead. He wanted to tell Sammy about it but Sam wouldn't believe him.

So Dean now stood at his father's grave, searching for answers. "Why do I have to be some kind of hero?" Tears streamed down the Winchester's face like waterfalls. "I can't go after it alone Dad. What am I supposed to do? You never started hunting. I have no con-" He stopped instantly at that thought. "Emma." Bobby Singer had been a hunter before John met him. Which means Emma was still a hunter.

Dean rushed home and did all the research he could to find out what he could about Bobby. His heart sunk when he found the article though, the obit. Robert Singer, murdered savagely in his home. Dean couldn't believe it. Nothing compared to what he read after that though. "MECHANIC BUTCHERED BY PSYCHOTIC DAUGHTER" Psychotic? Emma? Emma would never do that. He read through the article. "Robert 'Bobby' Singer's body was found a little over a month ago, butchered. He was found in several pieces scattered around his house. Found at the scene, covered in his blood was his twenty-six year old daughter Emma. Two days ago Singer was found guilty and sent to the South Dakota Human Services Center, otherwise known as Yankton State Hospital, as she was found not to have the mental stability for prison." The article came out a month before Dean read it. It went on to discuss the details of the trial but Dean didn't care.

Dean stared at the paper. "They locked her up? She wouldn't kill Bobby," he whispered. Dean jumped off the couch and ran out of the house to his car. He tore off down the street and headed out of Lawrence. It wasn't until late the next day or early the morning after that, that Dean finally pulled into Yankton, South Dakota.

He got a hotel room and slept for a few hours before leaving for the hospital. Dean got there and walked up to the front desk. "Can I help you," an older woman behind the desk asked.

"Yeah umm," Dean paused for a moment, his hands were shaking. "I'm looking for a patient here."

"Name?"

"Emma Singer."

The woman looked up at him. "I'm sorry sir, she's in our Isolation unit, only family is allowed to visit her."

"I'm her fiance. We had a bit of a falling out a while ago, I want to check on her," he said quickly.

The woman studied him for a moment. "May I see some ID please?"

"Yeah." Dean pulled out his wallet and found his driver's license. He still hadn't gotten used to not using a fake ID. The woman studied the ID for a moment before calling an orderly down to direct him to Emma's room.

"Emma Singer," she told the orderly who cringed at the name.

It seemed to Dean that everyone here seemed to fear Emma. "So you were getting married to this psycho bitch?"

"Shut up," Dean snapped. He knew very well that Emma was no 'psycho bitch'. The orderly stopped in front of a large metal door with a tiny window.

He knocked on the door and shouted. "Singer you got a visitor."

With that the orderly opened the door. He pointed to the call button on the side of the wall inside and told Dean to hit if she tries anything. Dean walked in and closed the door behind him. The room was white, sterile. Dean was shocked there wasn't padding on it. Emma sat in a chair by the window, staring out it. She looked over at him slowly. When she saw him her eyes widened. Dean thought for a moment she remembered him. "Hi," he said softly.

"Great," Emma sighed. "I knew I shouldn't have trusted that hot doctor with the emo glasses." She rolled her eyes.

Dean laughed, leaning against the wall. "What makes you say that?"

"I'm having full conversations with my hallucinations now."

"I'm a hallucination?"

Emma looked at him for a moment. "Why else would I be seeing you? I've seen you almost every night since I got here. What makes this any different, other than I'm pretty sure I'm still awake." She stood and walked over to him. There were marks on her arms that seemed to be from her fingernails. She was pale and thinner than Dean remembered. "So does my hallucination have a name?"

"Dean… Winchester," he answered.

"Like the-"

"Rifle? Yeah." He smiled at her taking a step closer. He couldn't help but close the gap between them. Things felt right when he kissed Carmen but never perfect like when he was close to Emma, even though Emma had no idea who he was.

"So what brings you to see me Dean Winchester, if you aren't a hallucination?"

"What happened to your father?"

"Didn't you hear? I went crazy and chopped him up into pieces." She took a step back, away from him and looked up at him. There was something about him, something so familiar, other than the dreams she had. Something about the way he smelled, the way his voice sent chills down her spine. She couldn't explain it but it was there.

"That's not what the papers say you said. What do you think happened to your father?"

"And why should I tell you? You wouldn't believe me anyway."

"You were hunting something? Hunt gone wrong?"

Emma's eyes shot up towards him when he said 'hunting'. "What… what do you know about hunting?"

"More than you think. Tell me what happened."

Emma sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed. "A man showed up at our house. It was early in the morning. A demon, well a man possessed by one. A bad one. He told my father he was looking for a gun. See there's this gun that Samuel Colt."

"Bobby had the Colt?"

"You know about the Colt?" Emma shook her head and ran her fingers through her short blonde hair. "My dad said he didn't have it. The man knew better though. I've run into some powerful demons before but this was something else. Holy water had no affect on him."

"Did he have yellow eyes?"

"Yeah," Emma answered. "I told him to get the hell out. He threw me against the wall. I blacked out and when I woke up again the Colt was gone and my dad was scattered in pieces around the room. There was so much blood. I should have been smarter," she whispered. "I shouldn't have been so stupid. I should have saved him. He's my dad." Tears filled her eyes and she buried her head in her hands.

She looked up slowly when she felt Dean's hands on her knees. He was kneeling in front of her and their eyes met for a moment. "I know how you feel. My father made a deal with a demon to save my life. I'm so sorry Emma," he whispered kissing her forehead.

Emma backed away from him and looked at him with a baffled and frightened expression. "Who are you?"

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about Emma. You're the only one I can tell that will believe me. None of this is real." Dean sat down next to her and sighed. "A few days ago… my brother Sammy and I, we were working on this hunt. We were hunting a djinn. I… I went to stop it."

"You went after a djinn alone?! What are you stupid?!"

"Shut up and listen. I went after it and it sidelined me. Then I wake up next to this girl, my mother's still alive, Sammy's girlfriend's still alive and you're here."

"I knew you?"

"Umm," Dean glanced down and turned a little red. "Yeah. You were umm… you were pregnant."

Emma stared wide eyed at Dean. "I was what? Please don't tell me it's with your…." Dean simply nodded his head. "Oh god, my father would kill me."

"Yeah," Dean said with a laugh. "That's not really important. I need you to help me. You have to help me find it, kill it. I can't keep doing this, I have to set things right."

Emma nodded and looked down. There was something about being close to the complete stranger that felt right to Emma. She didn't even realize it but both of them had reached over and laced each others' fingers together. When they both finally noticed they looked down at their hands then back to lock eyes with each other. Who was this man, this Dean Winchester?


	7. I'm Not Really Me Without You There

-1"I. Love. You."

Dean couldn't get it off his mind no matter how hard he tried. This woman he woke up next to. He felt something for her, as if he were supposed to love her but those words were meant for Emma and now Emma wasn't part of his life. As he sat next to her on the bed he came to that realization. She looked at him as though he were crazy when all Dean wanted to do was scream how much he loved her. It scared him how much she meant to him. Everything was perfect here though. Almost everything. His mother was alive. Dean couldn't even begin to explain how good it felt to hug her, to feel her soft fingers against his face. It was a touch he had longed for since he was four years old. Dean never wanted it to end. It wasn't all perfect though. Yes, Jessica was alive and Sam was finally happy, but he didn't talk to Dean. They hated each other, or at least that's how it seemed. It killed Dean to think that Sammy couldn't talk to him. Then there was Emma. She was locked up for something she didn't do. Dean knew the world of the rational though. They would never believe, a demon killed Bobby. Emma had been a part of Dean's life for almost four years now, no matter how distant it was. From the moment Dean met Emma they clicked. She understood him better than anyone he had ever met. Everything was different now, in this place. This wasn't his Emma. This girl was sitting on the bed, hugging her knees to her chest and on the verge of tears. It wasn't Emma. What had this place done to her? Dean didn't even notice when he wrapped an arm around her.

The look on Sam's face when he would look at Jessica was something that Dean never wanted to give up. The feel of his mother's touch, her scent, her voice, that damn sandwich she made him. He didn't want to give it up, but deep down he knew something wasn't right. He looked at Emma, who should be giving birth to his child in a matter of months and he saw this completely different woman, yet she was still just as fiery. There was something different about her, something broken that hurt Dean down to his very soul to see. He wanted to scream at the top of his lungs that he loved her but she'd just think he was crazy. Everything was perfect and awful at the same time. Dean was torn between a desire for two different worlds. Here his mother was alive and Dean spent his whole life thinking that was what he always wanted. Now he looked at Emma and realized how hard it was to live without her, without Sammy and he wondered if it was worth it. His mother would have wanted him to be happy right? Was he really happy here, in this illusion. Every time he thought he wasn't he'd hear his mother's voice, smell the perfume in the air and realize that he was happy.

"Dean," Emma's perfect, soft, angelic voice thrust Dean out of his thoughts. He glanced over at her and noticed his arm around her. Dean quickly stood and ran a hand through his hair. He glance back at Emma who just sat staring at him.

"You think I'm crazy don't you," Dean asked with a sigh.

"I never said that," she answered. The young woman, the love of Dean Winchester's life, in some other reality the mother of his child, stood and took two steps forward, closing the gap between them. "Tell me about what we were like," she whispered. "Anything's got to be better than locked up in this place with the image of your father getting ripped to pieces," she whispered as a single tear fell down her cheek. "Remembering that there was nothing you could do to stop it. I can still hear him scream." Emma's eyes were distant but remained locked with Dean's as though she were looking through him. "Tell me about what we were like."

Dean looked down into her eyes, truly captivated by them for the first time since he had met Emma. She was begging, pleading with him for an escape. Dean didn't realize it but the look she had in her eyes was the same one he had in his the night Madison died. Dean didn't bother to stop himself as he ran his fingers through her blonde hair. "My dad," he began but his throat closed up for a moment. "My dad was a hunter. After… After my mom died when I was a kid, after she was killed by a demon, my dad went looking for answers. He took me and my brother Sam with him. We… we grew up on the road. A little over four years ago my dad met Bobby, I was with him. That's when I met you. We had kind of a fling I guess," he said turning a little red at the thought. "You stole my car and nearly drove it off a bridge."

"Sorry," Emma said with a faint smile.

"I… I didn't really talk to you or Bobby much after my dad and I left, mostly because Bobby threatened to shoot him, probably because of my behavior with you."

"That sounds like my dad."

"Cocked the shotgun and everything." Dean smiled at her, glad to see her smiling. "A few months ago you were hunting something in Wyoming and Sam found you in a cabin up there. You didn't know it at the time but Sammy was possessed. He left you there to die, tied up to the fireplace. Bobby called me when you hadn't checked in for a few days. By that point Sammy was himself again," Dean whispered as he sat down on the edge of the bed again, watching Emma turn to face him. "He asked us to find you. We did and you decided you wanted to stay on the road with us. We got really close, all of us. You and Sam were," he paused and laughed. "We did this hunt, a werewolf, in California. We thought it might be targeting this woman named Madison. Sammy stayed with her. Sam's a compassionate person you know. He really cares about people. Ever since his girlfriend died, killed by the same demon because she got in the way the demon's 'plans' for Sam… anyway, he hasn't really let anyone close to him. He fell for this girl and it turned out that she was the werewolf. She didn't even realize it." Dean looked down, remembering the look in Sammy's eyes as he took the gun from Dean's hand. "Sam killed her. I spent my whole life keeping Sam from being a killer, it's the one thing that demon wants him to become. I spent my whole life protecting him from that kind of pain and…" Dean looked up when he felt the bed shift a bit as Emma sat down next to him. "That night, you and I, we snuck into the hotel room next door to ours and… I needed an escape. I needed to forget that look in Sammy's eyes, the pain he had. I didn't think it would end how it did."

"How did it end?"

"Six weeks later you told me you were pregnant."

Emma nodded slowly and looked away. She stood for a moment and walked over to the barred window overlooking the parking lot. "That yours," she asked pointing to the black car. Only seeing the top of it she could identify it as an Impala. Dean stood and walked over, he looked out the window and nodded. "Dean," she asked looking up at him. "Was… Was I in love with you?"

Dean stared at her for a moment. He couldn't answer that. Dean had told her that he loved her, tried to explain it but Emma had never once said it back. Part of Dean knew that she was but she was just too afraid to admit it. Dean himself, was surprised he had even said it in the first place. "I… I don't know, but," he paused and looked down at her again. "I was in love with you."

It was silent for a long time, it seemed like an eternity to Dean Winchester as he stood staring at Emma who was looking out the window. There was a longing in her eyes unlike he had ever seen before. This place was suffocating her. Dean could see it in her empty eyes. She had this façade of being tough, this image that nothing could hurt her, but Dean could see straight through it. Dean was an expert on hiding his emotions. She was still hurting because of her father's death. She was still haunted by it. Dean understood. He knew how it felt. He didn't exactly what his father get torn to pieces but he knew how it felt to have your father ripped away from you and know that you couldn't do a thing. Dean had the added guilt of knowing that it was his fault. John did it for him. Dean knew what she was going through. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to him for the first time. It felt so good to hold her so close, feel her body against his.

Emma couldn't even begin to explain how his embrace felt. It was something she had never experienced before. It was the all encompassing feeling of safety. She felt as if no matter what happened, Dean would be able to protect her from it. Emma closed her eyes and rested her head against his chest.

Dean looked down at her when he felt her hands rest on his chest. He sighed softly and kissed the top of her head. He held her close and listened to her cry. Dean hated hearing Emma cry more than anything. Each tear that fell down her face killed a piece of Dean. He wanted to take her away from all of this, to make it all better, to save her. He hadn't realized how much he missed being close to her until she was out of his life. The older Winchester couldn't even imagine his life without the fiery hunter. Emma was part of Dean's strength. She made everything all right. She made it all right for Dean to show the slightest hint of emotion. When he couldn't in front of Sam, he could in front of Emma. She understood him on a level he didn't quite understand. It was like she could read his mind, like they were created to be a balance for one another. Dean loved how he felt when he was so close to Emma. This wasn't his Emma though. This was a broken girl and seeing her like this destroyed Dean. He felt so helpless, unable to do anything to ease the pain she was going through. He knew the fact that no one believed her had to make things that much harder for her to cope. She had no one to talk to about it. How could she cope? Dean wanted to tell her that everything would be all right, that the pain would go away, but he knew that would be a lie. The pain would never really go away. It would ease off just enough that you could put it to the back of your mind but it would always be there. The knowledge that she would never see her father again would always be there. Eventually it would stop haunting her though. Eventually she would stop thinking about it every second of every day, but the pain would never go away. The only way Dean could take that pain away was to make it not real. The only way to do that was to find the djinn. "Emma," he whispered. "If I get you out of here will you help me find this djinn so I can set things straight and get my life back?"

Emma looked up at him and took a step back. "Get me out? How do you plan on doing that Dean? What's the point anyway, my father's dead."

"No," Dean said quickly. "No not really. I mean… I mean in my world, Bobby, Bobby's still alive. He nearly killed me when we told him about the baby, but he's still alive. Please, Emma I'm begging you to help me."

Emma studied him for a moment, letting the decision go through her mind. "How do you plan on breaking me out of this place?"


	8. Don't Know Where I'd Be Without You Here

-1Everything was perfect. Dean was home, in his real world with Emma and Sammy by his side. Nothing could be better. Emma was a few months along now. She still went on the hunts with them but stayed in the hotel for the more dangerous ones. She still hadn't said it. Dean hadn't brought it up either. He told her once, twice that he loved her and she hadn't said a word about it since then. The tears in her eyes when he and Sam returned from the warehouse in Joliet were words enough. Sam had called her upon finding Dean and Emma feared the worst. When Dean walked through the door into their hotel room in Joliet, Emma's heart stopped. The kiss they shared was unlike any before. She held him close to her, afraid to let him go. The cried for hours in his arms. It wasn't until she fell asleep that Sam and Dean talked about what had happened to him, what he saw in the dream he was trapped in.

Dean sat next to Emma's sleeping form on the bed and ran his fingers through her now long blonde hair. She looked so peaceful when she slept. Dean glanced over at his little brother and watched him sleep as well. A week and a half had passed since Dean's brush with death. Everything was almost too perfect. Dean wondered silently to himself what would go wrong now. His life couldn't be perfect. The Winchesters didn't have that kind of luck. He felt her move closer to him and decided not to think about the 'what ifs' in their lives. Dean's hand rested on her stomach and his mind turned to thoughts of the baby that was growing inside of her. The baby that was his flesh and blood. He still wondered even now if he was ready to be a father. Part of him told him that he could never be the father his was. He couldn't even dream of coming close to his father.

Everything was perfect. Nothing could get any worse. Emma sat in the back seat of the Impala as Dean pulled up to little diner. "Don't forget the extra onions," Dean said with a smile.

"NO!" Emma shouted.

"Dude we're the ones that are gonna have to ride in the car with your extra onions."

"Sam you get him those and I'll kill you," Emma snapped, but held a smile on her face.

Sam rolled his eyes and got out of the car after Dean handed him some cash. "See if they got any pie," he told Sam. Again Sam rolled his eyes. "Bring me some pie!"

"Ooo, ooo, me too," Emma said with a smile. She watched Sam walk into the diner and glanced over at Dean. "We should think of names," she said softly. "Unless you plan on not naming the kid."

Dean didn't have a lot of time to answer though. The radio became staticy and the all too familiar sound of wind filled the air. Dean and Emma looked to the diner and couldn't see Sam through the window. Both were out of the car and in the diner in the blink of an eye. "Sammy," Dean and Emma called. Everyone who had been in the diner was dead, throats slashed. Emma stared in terror as she followed Dean to the back door of the diner. He opened the door and called for his brother but there was still no answer. Dean turned and looked at her, the fear in his eyes tore at her heart. Then he looked down at his hand and Emma's heart stopped dead. "Sulfur," the two whispered in unison.

Emma didn't get a chance to respond before Dean was out the door screaming Sam's name. Emma stood just outside the front door of the diner and stared at Dean as he turned to her slowly. Sam was gone, missing, taken. Where? Why? Who? All these questions were going through Emma's head. She tried to hide the fear and tears in her eyes but failed miserably. She walked up to Dean and took his right hand, lacing their fingers together. "We'll find him Dean," she whispered in his ear before placing a soft kiss on his cheek.

The hours passed like an eternity as they waited for her father to show up. Emma ran up to the truck as Bobby pulled up along the empty road, behind the Impala. "Daddy!" She shouted as she ran. "Sammy's missing, taken." Tears streamed down Emma's eyes. Over the last few months, as she got closer to Dean, she got closer to Sam. The taller, younger Winchester had become a younger brother to her and a good friend. Sam and Dean were Emma's world. She loved them more than anything. With Bobby around it was like the four of them were a family, something Emma had wanted since she was little.

She stood in front of her father and stared as Dean explained what happened. Emma hadn't moved at all as Bobby ran back to his truck and grabbed a map, hoping to help Dean as much as he could. She jumped when she felt another hand touch her own shaky hand, only to realize it was Dean. She looked over at him and saw the tears in his hazel eyes. He was holding them back, pretending that they were never there but Emma could tell. She could always see the tears in Dean's eyes. Bobby returned with the map. The gray sky, on the brink of rain, added to the tension surrounding the hunters. Emma found it hard to pay any attention to what her father was saying. She was consumed with worry for Sam. Emma attributed it to the fact that she was pregnant. She did not want to admit how close she had become to the Winchesters. If she admitted how she feared for Sam's life as though he were her brother, she would be forced to admit how she felt for Dean.

It had been at least a month since Dean had told Emma, point blank, that he loved her. Emma pretended it never happened. She was far to afraid to admit that she loved him, to even think about it. When she cried now she blamed it on the baby and being emotional because she was pregnant. It was so much more than that though. Sam Winchester was once an enemy, someone she remained slightly afraid of for months after meeting him. Now he was family. He was the little brother that Emma had always wanted and never had. She felt a need to protect him that terrified her. She could never fight back the question of how she must feel for Dean if she felt so strongly for Sam. The Winchesters had turned her world upside down.

She remembered vaguely how John and Dean had done that when they first met. She still remembered Dean's cocky smile and attitude. He was trying to impress her. Dean tried less hard to impress her nowadays, but he always had that cocky confident smile. Neither John, nor Dean, had ever mentioned Sam. Emma was taken by surprise upon meeting the youngest Winchester. He was nothing like she thought a Winchester should be. Sam was kind, warm, compassionate. It was as if he were the polar opposite of Dean. At the same time though, the two were exactly alike. Both were incredibly stubborn.

"Emma," Dean called, jarring Emma from her thoughts and fears. She looked up at him, catching his gaze completely for the first time in a long time. "That was Ash. He has something for us, we're going to the Roadhouse."

Emma nodded and climbed into the car almost before Dean finished speaking. She climbed into the front seat, Dean in the driver seat and her father in the back. Emma never took her eyes off the road as they drove to the Roadhouse. It was not until they pulled up that Emma's eyes moved from the asphalt. The Roadhouse was burned to the ground. Emma, who had been close to the Harvelles plus Ash all her life, ran out of the car before Dean even stopped it. "ASH!" She ran through what remained of the door and looked around the ruins. There were charred bodies everywhere but no sign of Ellen or Ash. Dean followed behind her and Bobby behind him. "ELLEN," Emma shouted. She pulled up some charred boards in hope of finding something, but found nothing. When Dean spoke, Emma looked over at him. She walked over to stand next to him and saw the body. It was burned beyond recognition, but they both knew that it was Ash. The watch gave it away. Emma's heart stopped. Dean slowly wrapped his arms around her, turning her away from Ash's charred body.

"I'm so sorry Emma." Dean's voice was nothing but a soft comforting whisper in Emma's ear. He had different thoughts in his mind though. How were they supposed to find Sam now? Ash was the only one who had anything resembling a lead on where Sam might be. Dean was quickly losing hope in finding his brother.

"Oh god," Emma whispered. "Dean what are we going to do now? How are we going to find Sam?" She hadn't thought of that when she saw Ash's body. Her distraction was painful and short lived though. Sam would always be their priority. The trio walked back to the Impala. They were quiet for what seemed like an eternity, all attempting to find out some way to find the wayward Winchester. Emma stood next to Dean on the driver's side of the car while her father stood on the other side. She was about to ask if they had any ideas when Dean's hand went to his head and he toppled over the top of the car. "Dean," she whispered placing her small hand softly on his shoulder. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah," he whispered. "It was.. It was just a headache." Emma glanced up as Bobby asked if he got them often. "No," both answered in unison. Another second later he had another one. It was a piercing pain that he couldn't put words to. It felt to him like his head was being torn apart. "I could have sworn I just saw something."

"A vision? Like Sam?" Both Emma and her father asked.

"What? No, I'm no psychic." Dean shook his head, trying to ignore the pain. It was impossible though as another wave hit him and the picture was clearer. It was a bell, and Sam. Dean told Bobby what he saw and within seconds they were in the car and headed down the road.

Nothing could have prepared Emma, or Dean for that matter, for what was to come. The hardest part wasn't finding Sam. They found him easy enough. Emma was exhausted by the time they got through the thick woods surrounding the old ghost town. "Sammy," she called along with Dean.

Emma, Dean, and Bobby rounded a corner and found Sam. The relief that filled Dean was unlike anything Emma had ever seen. She felt it inside her too. Emma wanted to run to him. It all happened so fast though. Dean realized it before she did and he was running towards Sam. It took a moment or so for Emma to realize what happened. Sam had been stabbed in the back, literally. Emma watched him drop to his knees. This part was an eternity. It felt as though she would never get to them as she ran to catch up to Dean.

She felt this part of her dying as Sam was. Emma wanted to chase after the bastard that did this but all she could think of was being near Sam and Dean. All she could see was Sam on his knees in the mud, blood flowing from the corners of his mouth. It was as if Emma's worst nightmares were coming true. She was losing everything in a single instance. The girl stared at the brothers and she found it impossible to breathe. Everything was falling apart. They were supposed to be a family. Dean and Emma, their little baby, whom they had decided they would name John after Dean's father, and Uncle Sammy. Emma couldn't help but wonder what they were going to do now.

"SAMMY!" She didn't even hear herself screaming, she didn't realize she had been running. She dropped to her knees just as Dean did and knelt next to the brothers as Dean held his baby brother. The fear in his voice terrified her. Then she saw the light, the happy glow that was always in Sam's eyes, fade away. All that was left was a shadow, a corpse. "Sammy," she whispered as Dean shook his brother. Tears flooded down Dean's cheeks as he held Sam close, screaming his name as if that would help at all. Emma's heart broke, seeing the tears falling down Dean's face. Emma watched Sam die that night and a part of her and Dean died that night too.


	9. Tears Run Down From My Eyes

-1"I reject your reality and substitute my own." They were the only words spoken in two days. Sam's body was laying on a bed in one of the run down houses where they had found him. Dean had been sitting by him for hours before he had finally stood to stretch his legs. Emma took his place in the small wooden chair next to Sam's bed. After she spoke she glanced back at Dean. He was glaring at her. Apparently he didn't find it as amusing as she did. Her father had left hours ago to get food for them. She was beginning to get worried. She worried more for Dean than anything. He hadn't said a word or eaten since Sam died. The thought was almost more than Emma could stomach. Sam, dead. It seemed wrong. Sam was never supposed to be dead. If any of them were to die first everyone thought it would be Dean. Though with his track record with death anything was possible. Seeing Sam laying there lifeless, not breathing, was unbearable for her. Emma tried to imagine what was going on in Dean's mind. Sam was his brother, the last of Dean's family. He had lost everything. Emma could never imagine how that felt. For days she had tried to think of something to say to Dean, but nothing seemed right. The silence was going to kill them both.

The door creaked open but neither of them noticed it. Bobby came in holding a cardboard bucket of chicken. Neither spoke. Bobby offered them the food but Emma remained silent. For the first time in days though Dean spoke. It wasn't much but it was progress in Emma's mind. "No thanks, I'm not hungry." That was a lie if Emma had ever heard one. He didn't want to take his eyes off Sam though. Emma understood, or at least she wished she did. Sam had become like family to her. Emma was still unsure of what Dean was. Dean was complicated and Emma was sure it would always be that way. Sam though, Sam was like her little brother, one of her closest friends. Aside from the fact that when she first met him he left her to die, Sam and Emma had hit it off immediately. Emma listened, while staring at Sam, to her father and Dean fight. She could hear the pain in Dean's voice and it killed her each time he spoke. Dean had gone through enough, he didn't deserve pain like this. Emma wished more than anything now that there was something she could do to take the pain away.

She was only half listening to their argument. Her thoughts consumed her mind mostly, until she heard Dean shouting. Her dad had said something about the end of the world and Dean's response made Emma's heart stop. Let it end? Why would he say that? Emma stood, she didn't even realize it until she was standing in front of Dean. "You don't mean that Dean," she whispered even though her father had already said that.

"I don't?"

"Maybe I should rephrase Dean. You can't mean that. Sam's dead and you're hurting, I understand that, but you don't mean that." She took a deep breath and glanced down. By now it was more than obvious that she was pregnant. She fought the urge to place her hands on her belly as that would be incredibly cliché. "Dean you have more to live for than Sam. You have more to take care of. Or did you forget about that?"

"I didn't forget Emma," he snapped, trying not to shout at her. She was angry, and that scared him slightly. Emma had always scared him when she was angry. She could scare any demon if she were angry enough. "I didn't forget, but Sam's gone. Nothing else matters. You could never understand! If I could trade that baby for my brother I would, in a heartbeat, without a second thought."

She wanted to yell, to scream, to slit his throat, but she refrained… for the moment. He was angry, hurting, but that didn't change what he said. Emma was in pain too. Sam was family. Nothing hurt her more than those words though. He was the one that fought with her to keep the child and now he was giving it all up. She took a small step back and turned to her father. "Dean apparently doesn't care if the world ends, but I would like to see my son. We're leaving."

It seemed simple enough. Just leave, don't look back. She tried for the next few days while she was at home with her father to get Dean off her mind. It was impossible though. Her father was silent, just as angry about what Dean had said as Emma was, or at least he seemed to be. It was different for Emma who was actually carrying the child. She could tell her father was angrier about how Dean's words had hurt her than the fact that Dean actually said them. Everything was falling apart. First Sam, now this. It was almost too much for the already overly emotional woman. Her heart ached as they pulled away from the house and headed towards her home. Her home was supposed to be with Sam and Dean and now it was with neither. Emma cursed the god she once vaguely believed in, wondering what Dean had done to deserve so much pain in his life. He had lost everything and there was nothing that Emma could do to fix that, no matter how much she wanted to.

The next few days passed like an eternity. Bobby and Emma had come up empty handed. They had nothing to go on to find this demon or what the demon was planning. It was beginning to frustrate Emma who was now quite a ways along in her pregnancy, everything frustrated her. The last few days had been routine for Emma and Bobby. Wake up, spend all day researching, fall asleep at the books and wake up again the next morning. Then something disrupted their routine; a knock on Bobby's front door. Emma was in the back room looking through books when Bobby answered the door and saw Dean standing there. There was a shadow that covered Bobby and he knew it wasn't Dean. Only one person was tall enough for that. Bobby looked to the figure standing next to Dean and saw his baby brother, who had been dead for at least two days, standing next to him as if nothing had happened. Sam said hello, obviously oblivious to the fact that he had been dead. He thanked Bobby for patching him up. Bobby realized that was what Dean had told Sam.

Emma carried a couple books into the room and put them on Bobby's desk. She took no notice of the boys as she walked in. "Hey Emma," Sam said weakly. Emma froze and nearly dropped the books she had in her hand. That wasn't Sam's voice. There was no way that was possible. She slowly turned to face the voice that could not in any way possibly be Sam and saw him standing there. Standing? How? Emma walked over to him and Dean, though she didn't notice Dean right away. Her concern was with Sam at the moment. She tried to fight back the tears in her eyes, but was failing miserably.

"Sam," she whispered, unable to hide the amazement and fear in her voice. She saw Dean standing behind him then realized that something was not right. She glared at Dean before actually speaking to him. "Dean, can I talk to you alone please?"

"What's this about," Sam asked. The way that the three of them were acting confused him. Why did Bobby and Emma look so angry with Dean? Why did they seem so surprised to see him?

"Dean and I got into a fight before you woke up. I wanted to talk to him about it." Dean simply nodded and took two steps forward before Emma grabbed his right arm and pulled him out of the house into the back where the cars were. "What did you do Dean Winchester?!" He was silent. He could not bring himself to look at her. "How long?" Again, Dean said nothing. Emma closed her eyes and sighed. Dean thought for a moment that she was crying. He went to comfort her and before he could even react or comprehend what was happening Emma's hand met with his face… hard. Emma always had been far too strong for her own good. She was like a man when she hit you, like a man hitting you with a cinderblock then a crowbar. It was unbelievable what she could do with one simple punch. She sent Dean spinning before he hit the ground.

Dean stood quickly and stretched his jaw, hoping she didn't break it. "What the hell Emma?!"

"Answer me or your jaw will be the least of your worries Dean."

"One year!"

Emma stared at him, letting what he said sink in. She didn't know what to say. The words weren't forming in her mind let alone her mouth. All the could think of was to hit him again… so she did. "What were you thinking?! No, don't answer that! You weren't thinking!"

"I had to! He's my brother. I had to," Dean shouted, though he kept his voice rather low so that Sam wouldn't hear him.

"What's Sam going to say when you die in a year Dean? Did you think about that? Five years from now when your son asks why he doesn't have a father what am I supposed to say?" She glared at the older Winchester who was unable to answer her questions. That hadn't been on Dean's mind at the time. The only thing Dean had been thinking of was that Sam needed to be alive. "How can I tell him what happened?" She shook her head. "What am I supposed to say? Your grandfather died to save your daddy who then decided to blow that all to hell to save Sam?! How do I explain that Dean! What am I supposed to say!"

"I had to Emma!" He shook his head and looked down. "You wouldn't understand. At least something good will come out of it. I shouldn't even be alive anyway. Sam's life is the one that matters."

"And yours doesn't," she snapped at him. Emma took a step closer and Dean stepped back, afraid she would hit him again. She looked into his eyes, searching for an answer to his madness but found only confusion and pain. "Dean you're going to be a father!"

"No, it doesn't, not like Sam's."

"How can you even think that Dean? There are people here who love you! What do you mean you're life's not worth it!" She shook her head and closed her eyes, fighting back the tears. She hated crying in front of Dean. She was the strong one. Emma hated thinking she was weak. She prided herself in being "one of the guys". She was like Dean in that way, she hated showing emotion. Emma, like Dean, bottled it up inside her and, like Dean had a tendency to explode rather violently.

"What the hell does that mean?! Don't lecture me on this Emma," he snapped at her. Dean's patience was running thin. No one else was doing anything for Sam, he had to do something. There was no way he could let Sam die. "Sammy's life is worth more than anything."

"You do have worth to people Dean."

Dean sighed and took a small step forward. It was the closest he had been to Emma since Sam died. Both of them wanted to close the gap completely. Dean's arms were strong, comforting, familiar to Emma. She was safe there. Emma was Dean's crutch at times. He leaned on her more than he was willing to admit. "I know what my life means to Sam. I had to do it though, I had to bring Sam back. Emma, I couldn't let him die," Dean whispered, as single tear running down his cheek.

"I'm not talking about Sam! I'm talking about ME!" Her heart stopped, literally. It stopped for a moment and she stared at him, turning ghostly white. Emma could not believe she had just said that and Dean seemed just as astonished. "I… I… I love you."

The words were so foreign to her. Love was something that Emma tried her best to stay away from. She was never able to define what she had with Dean Winchester. Not even Emma was one hundred percent sure that what she felt was love, that was the most accurate term though. She stood there in disbelief, completely oblivious to the fact that there were tears streaming down her face. She did not notice them, or anything for that matter, until she felt fingertips against her cheeks. Dean brushed his thumbs over her cheeks, wiping away her tears. "Emma," he whispered resting his forehead against hers. "I'm sorry. I couldn't let Sammy down though. Please try and understand that," he whispered. "Don't tell him."

Emma glanced up at him and sighed. He kissed her forehead and finally wrapped his arms around her. An embrace she had not felt since they discovered the charred remains of the roadhouse and Ash's body. Emma couldn't help but feel as though her life was falling apart.

Later that day they discovered that Ellen had survived the fire. Emma was sleeping when they discussed what Ash had found. Dean walked into Emma's bedroom and sat next to her on the bed for a few moments. He didn't have a lot of time, but he had to let her know where they were going. Dean took her hand. She slowly opened her eyes. "Ash found something, we're going to check it out. You have to stay here though," he whispered. "You can't come with us on the hunts anymore, not for a while." The thought of how painful it would be to leave her and Sam, and his son, had not occurred to him when he made the deal. While he sat there on the side of Emma's bed however he was starting to realize it. Dean leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "I love you." The words still scared Dean. He had never felt so strongly about someone before.

Emma drifted off to sleep and didn't hear from Dean until the four of them (Dean, Sam, Bobby, and Ellen) returned to Bobby's three days later. She jumped out of her seat when they walked in, mostly because she had no warning and they scared the crap out of her, partly because she was glad to see them all in one piece. Emma stayed up all night with Dean laying next to her in her bed as he told her about what happened and how they killed the demon that had tormented them for over twenty years. It was silent for a long time and Emma rested her head on his chest. He told her about seeing his dad and she smiled. "It's official then, we have to name him John. He just needs a middle name." Emma sighed and closed her eyes. There was also the issue of his last name. The two were not married and Emma did not plan on ever actually marrying Dean. Emma sat up and glanced at him. "He should have your name." She smiled and lowered her head again.

"Don't worry about it right now," he whispered. He watched her fall asleep, but could not do so himself. He never counted on Emma and the baby when he made that deal. Sammy would take care of them though, and when Dean wouldn't be able to look after them when he died, he knew now that his father could.


	10. Can't Fight This Feeling

-1"Son of a bitch," Dean muttered as he held his cell phone to his ear. He and Sam were on a hunt, a rather dangerous one, trying to track the demons they released months earlier. They had been gone for a few hours and were almost done when his phone went off. "Can't you just like… hold it in or something?"

"Dean," Sam whispered. "What's going on?"

"Emma thinks she's having the baby," Dean said simply. He turned his attention toward he woman on the phone. "Just try and hold it in for a little longer."

"It doesn't work that way Dean," Sam snapped at the same time Emma did. Dean shook his head and looked at his brother for a moment. "Let me have the phone." Dean sighed and handed Sam the phone. "Emma? All right, what does it feel like… Okay, where's Bobby?… Damn it. All right, call Ellen, she shouldn't be too far from you. Have her take you to the hospital and we'll get there as soon as we possibly can." Sam hung up the phone and looked at Dean.

"Her timing's great isn't it," he asked with a proud yet sarcastic smile.

"I'll stay here, finish this one up and you go meet her at the hospital."

"No way. I'm not leaving you alone here Sammy. If I'm leaving you're coming with me."

"We can't just let this go unfinished."

"So we finish it," Dean answered with a smile on his face. "Shouldn't be too hard."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Let's just get this over with so you don't have to explain to Bobby why you weren't there when your son was born."

The kill was pretty simple. It went by quickly and they were out of there in a couple hours. Dean tore down the highway, heading for the hospital which held Emma and his son. He almost slammed on the brakes at that thought. It had never really completely hit Dean until that moment that he was going to be a father. He was unsure he was ready to have the complete understanding of what his father went through raising the boys on the road. He kept pressing on though. Luckily they were not too far from the hospital and they got there quickly. Sam waited in the waiting room while Dean ran into the delivery room. "EMMA!"

"Dean Winchester you do this to me again and so help me God I will walk right into Hell and beat the shit out of you," she snapped. For the moment the room was empty, it was just her and Dean.

"I'm sorry," he said quickly, taking her hand. "I tried to get here as soon as I could."

"I didn't mean missing the delivery, you dumbass! I meant getting me pregnant!" She squeezed his hand and closed her eyes tightly, gritting her teeth. Emma had been through a lot in her life. She was a hunter after all. Nothing compared to this though. She felt as though her insides were being ripped out and she just wanted it over with. Unlike most mothers in labor though she didn't scream or moan. Emma tried her best not to make a sound, it was the hunter's way. "Next time you're doing this!"

"Just squeeze my hand," he said, trying to be comforting. Emma did just as she was told and nearly broke Dean's hand. "Son of a bitch! Emma that's my good hand, watch it!"

"Well I'm sorry, you're just going to have to suffer with me!" As the doctor came in, Emma looked over at Dean. It was the first time Dean had really seen her face all night. He smiled faintly at her. "Where's Sammy," she asked quickly. She worried something happened to him on the hunt, that he and Dean were careless because Dean was distracted.

"He's outside waiting." Dean saw the worry in her eyes and gave her hand a gentle squeeze. "He's fine, don't worry."

The next hour or so went by too quickly and was far to chaotic for either Emma or Dean to truly remember. Everything stopped though when he heard the crying. Dean's whole world stopped for that brief second. The words that followed left both hunters in complete shock. "Congratulations Emma, Mr. Winchester, say hello to your daughter." The doctor handed Emma the baby and Emma was unsure of what to do.

"Are… are you sure?" They asked in unison. The doctor laughed and nodded before heading out of the room to give them some privacy and to let Sam in to see the baby.

"Hey, how's he doing," Sam asked with a smile.

"She," the two replied.

Sam stopped in his tracks. He blinked for a few minutes then started laughing. The idea that the baby might actually be a girl had never occurred to Emma or Dean. She just assumed it was a Winchester, therefore it would be a boy. She was convinced that was all the Winchesters could create. She looked at Dean, then at Sam, finally at the baby girl in her arms. It was obvious already that she had most of her father's features. At less than an hour old she had perfected Dean's pouty face. "What are we going to name her Dean? We didn't even think of a girl's name." She sighed and looked to Dean for some help. He had a completely unresponsive face.

"You could name her after Mom," Sam said quietly. "I mean you were going to name the baby after Dad if it was a boy, so why not Mom. It is kind of fitting with today."

"What's today," Emma asked. The last few weeks of her pregnancy she had lost all track of the date. Even now it was early in the morning, somewhere around Halloween, that was all she was aware of.

Sam looked at Dean and Dean's eyes widened. "I didn't even think about it," Dean whispered.

"Today's November 2nd, Emma," Sam told her softly.

"Jessica," Emma answered quickly. Sam had just barely said the date when she spoke. Dean and Sam both looked at her in a state of utter confusion.

"Why," Sam asked.

"Jessica Mary Winchester."

"As Sam said, why?"

"Because I don't like Mary for a first name," she answered simply. "No offense to your mother or anything, who I'm sure was a wonderful woman. I just don't like her name."

"Well then, that was easier than I thought it would be," Dean said simply. Sam stood in silence.

Emma smiled at him. "Come and look at her Sammy, she's gorgeous." It would be cheesy and cliché to say that Emma was glowing, but she had this look about her. It was the happiest Dean had ever seen her, and the saddest at the same time. Dean had nine more months, and they were no closer to finding a way out than they had been three months earlier. Emma was scared, though terrified was a more accurate term.

Dean smiled and stood, Emma handed him the baby and a sudden weight fell on his shoulders. The sudden realization that this child, this little girl in his arms, was his. His daughter, his child. He wanted his father to be there so badly, to see the look on Dean's face as he looked down at her. Sam stared in awe at his brother. Dean had always been the slacker for lack of a better word. He never took anything seriously, at least not on the surface. There was a look in his eyes though that Sam would never be able to explain. Dean was happy. He had a family, the one thing he always wanted. Sam smiled faintly, watching his older brother hold Jessica. She named her Jessica. Sam had not even suggested it, or thought of it for that matter. It was somewhat an honor. A little memory of the only woman that Sam ever truly loved lived on in the little girl Dean was holding in her arms.

Dean looked up at his brother and locked eyes with Sam. Everything was said, while their were no words spoken. There was an emotion that Sam had never seen before, more of a slew of emotions really. Regret, confusion, happiness, sadness. Sam just smiled, telling Dean in that simple gesture that no matter what happened, everything would be all right.

The doctor came back into the room and took the baby for a little while. Emma had fallen asleep and the boys walked out into the waiting room. "A girl, wow," Sam said with a smile. "Something tells me that nothing good can come from the two of you raising a girl."

"I won't," he said quietly. The realization hit him as he held his baby girl that he would not be a part of her life. He would be as much a part of her life as his mother was in Sam's.

"What do you mean you won't Dean? Of course you will. I told you, I'm getting you out of this deal," Sam snapped. "Nothing's going to happen to you."

"Yeah," Dean said softly, his voice drenched in doubt. He sat down in the chair next to him and ran his fingers through his hair.

Sam sighed and sat down across from Dean. "Catching up with you isn't it?"

"Who am I kidding Sam? I'm not parenting material. Hell, I can barely take care of myself." He closed his eyes and tried to let it all sink in.

"Dean, you realize that you're not alone in this don't you? You have Emma, you have me and Bobby, hell you've got Ellen too. You don't have to do this by yourself. As much as you seem completely blind to this fact, you're not Dad. True you may have more in common with him now than six months ago, but still, you are not Dad, Dean. You have people to help you."

Dean looked up at his brother. He never thought about it like that. Sam was there for him. Sam was always there for him. In nine months when his time was up Sam would still be there. Sam will be able to take care of his little girl. He smiled faintly at his little brother before standing. He looked down at Sam for a moment. "Thanks… bitch."

Sam laughed and stood as well. "You're welcome… jerk." They stood in silence for a brief moment. "I'm gonna get goin, head back to the hotel. I'll see you later." Dean nodded and Sam headed out of the hospital. Dean walked back into Emma's room and smiled at her. She was still sleeping. Dean kissed her forehead before walking out of the room and into the nursery. He picked up Jessica and sat down in the chair, rocking back and forth with the baby in his arms.

"Hey there," he whispered to her. "You're gonna be one badass chick someday you know. You're a Winchester, you're invincible." He sighed and smiled faintly. "I wish your grandpa was here, the one on my side. I'm kinda glad you're mother dad's not here. He's scary, just remember that. Don't ever do anything stupid like your daddy. Oh my god, I just said the word 'Daddy'." He laughed to himself. "Listen, I may not be around for very much longer. See, your dad did something for your Uncle Sammy. It was vaguely similar to something my dad did for me. Anyway, I want you to be good for Emma and Sammy. And another thing, you're gonna take good care of my car, missy. That's my baby… well actually you're my baby, but that's my other baby. You take care of it." Dean curled his lower lip between his teeth and sighed. "I wish you were here Dad. She's beautiful, like Mom." A single tear fell from his eyes as he swore he felt the comforting hand of his mother gently touch his cheek. There was nothing there though. "She'll make you proud Dad."


	11. Lay Your Weary Head To Rest

-1It was over, all was said and done and Emma Singer sat in an empty hotel room, staring at the wall ahead of her. Her nine month old daughter lay sleeping in a crib across the room. Emma had been silent for three days straight. She moved only to feed and rock her child. For the first day Emma would not let go of Jessica. She held the baby in her arms as if she were afraid someone would tear her away. Five hours had gone by since anyone entered the hotel room and finally Sam Winchester returned. He opened the door and looked at the broken shell of a woman sitting on the bed, hugging her knees to her chest.

Everything had changed. Nothing would ever be the same now. Three days ago, Dean Winchester died. He left in the middle of the night and the next morning Sam found his body sitting behind the wheel of his beloved Impala. There was no blood, no sign of struggle. Dean was simply dead, holding the only photograph that had been taken in the last few months. The photo was shockingly similar to one of Sam's. It was a picture of Dean in front of his car with Emma next to him and Jessica in his arms. A remake of the picture of John holding Sam in his arms with Mary and Dean.

Sam was not alone when he entered the dark hotel room. He was joined by two others, Emma's father Bobby, and Ellen Harvelle. Emma was oblivious to their presence until she heard her father speak. It had taken a day and a half for Sam to get up the courage to call Ellen and Bobby, to actually speak the words, "Dean's dead." Then it took a day and a half for them to drive to where Emma and Sam were. Bobby was in tears, his voice strained and broken as he sat down on the edge of the bed next to his daughter. "Emma," his gruff voice whispered as he took his daughter's and.

For the firs time in days, Emma responded. She snapped back to reality and looked over at her father. "Daddy. Daddy, he's gone." The tears flooded down Emma's cheeks. She had been holding them in but there was nothing that could hold them in anymore. Bobby wrapped his arms around her like he would when she was a baby and rocked her back and forth. There was a whole in her heart now, a gaping void that she could not fill. It hurt so bad it was making her physically sick and she had not eaten in almost two days because she could not hold anything down. Everything had stopped with that phone call.

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It was early, around five o'clock in the morning the day after Dean's deal was up. Emma was sleeping in the hotel room. Dean had left late that night to meet his fate, but neither Sam nor Emma knew about it. When Sam woke up that morning, to see if his brother was still alive, he found Dean missing. Sam, not wanting to disturb Emma, quietly got dressed and left the room. He saw that Dean's car was gone and walked down the dirt road a bit. It was not long before Sam saw his brother's car at the crossroads. He could see from a distance a figure inside it. Sam ran to the car, glad to see his brother only to discover that Dean was already gone.

There was no note, no sweet goodbye. He had said his goodbyes subtly earlier that night, and when he left he had kissed both his daughter and Emma on the forehead, knowing he would never see either of them again. The first thing Sam did was call Emma. She groggily picked up the phone, still not realizing that Dean was not in bed with her. "Hello?"

"Emma?" Sam paused and swallowed hard. His throat closed and he almost could not say the words. He had prepared himself for this, knowing that eventually it would happen as they had not found a way out of it. It was still unbearable on him. Sam's entire world was gone now. He was all that was left of his family. "Emma, I found Dean."

It was at that moment that Emma sat up and realized that Dean was not next to her. Tears filled her eyes. "Where are you?" Sam told her he was just down the road and Emma jumped out of bed, put her shoes on quickly and ran after him. She stopped a few yards from the crossroads when she saw Dean's car. She knew at that moment that Dean was gone. Her heart stopped then shattered. Emma ran to the car, hoping maybe she was wrong. "DEAN!"

Sam had to catch her to keep her from opening the door and letting the body drop to the ground. She struggled against him, screaming his brother's name but he did not let go. He could not let go. Sam needed to hold on to something right now. He felt as though he were falling. "Emma stop," he shouted at her. He turned her around to face him and looked down into her broken eyes. "Em, I don't know what to do? What do I do?" He pulled Emma into a much needed embrace and sobbed softly.

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That night, three days after his death, they laid Dean Winchester to rest the same way they had with his father. Emma stood in front of the fire, watching his body burn, holding her baby girl. Sam stood on her left and on her right was her father. Ellen stood on Sam's left holding the hand of her daughter Jo. Emma looked down at her daughter in her arms, Jessica was watching the fire with fascination in her eyes. "Your daddy was hero Jessica," she whispered to her daughter, then looked up at Sam. "He saved my life. He saved Sam's life. He's saved all of us. He made his daddy so proud and he loved you so much."

"Some day you will understand what he did. Some day you'll know." She smiled and kissed her daughters forehead as Jessica played with the amulet around her mother's neck. The baby was the saving grace in all of this. Emma turned her gaze towards the flames, a single tear fell from her right eye. "You wanted to know what good came from your life Dean." Emma choked on her words, looking down at her daughters hazel-green eyes and the smile on Jessica's face. "She's right here." Emma turned to Sam for a moment and he smiled at her before she turned her attention back to the flames. She forced a pained smile on her face. "Bitch."


End file.
